Death

Death is a primordial, anti-matter based entity who is to be hated by all mortal beings. When Death passes wind, his face implodes.

I will now tell you something pointless and boring about myself. I was born on the 82nd of Nune, in a factory located in-- Ooh, gherkin!

Trivia
Death's mother is a non-existant thing which in theory, should exist. Yes, it's true she doesn't exist. Just leave the matter alone, OK? Death is omnipresent, meaning that he is EVERYWHERE!!! o.O

Death's second cousin twice removed is Hamish the Alpaca.

It was once thought that Death had ancestral roots in Jamaica. This was disproven some time ago.

Death does not have a friend called Billy. Nor does he have one called Mandy. Sorry, kids.

Death apparently has no hands. Interesting.

Death likes gherkins.

Do not stereotype Death as a dark, hooded, scythe-wielding sociopath. This may be the case, but please, don't stereotype. It causes inflammation of Bob's nipples, and Bob is offended by nipples as it is.

Death does not feel remorse. His emotions were erased, all except his craving for gherkins.

Death does not sleep. He doesn't need to. Daniel Hoffland does his share of sleeping for him.

Is Death a virgin? Well, some universal mysterious are best left unsolved. And this is one of them.

Quotes
"Some people are afraid of death. I can't see why, I'm a nice guy really!"

"Hey, I decide who lives around here!"

"No! Not my supervisor!"

"I'm not a murderer, I'm just sustaining an balanced population."

"You...are...nex-- ooh, gerkin!"

"Aww man that was my last scythe!"

"My eyes! Please stop that NOW!! ARRRGH!! PLEASE!!"

"If I said anything like that, I'd be dead..."

"You can see me?!"

"Where's the blood?"

"That's not blood... Wait, it is."

"Your gurning does not affect me!!"

"Uh oh, I think I'm gonna--"

"I'm bored of killing... I guess I'll just start smashing coconuts!"

"The light, it burns... IT BURNS!"

"I have to go, I need to collect my cloak from the dry cleaners."

"My Reapers' Record totals at a staggering nine-hundred billion, twelve million, fifty-two thousand, three hundred and sixteen and counting. I'm GOOD!"

"Hey wait what?!"

"Who loves the chocolate? Everyone loves the chocolate! Nobody hates the chocolate - cuz everyone loves the chocolate!! O.O Ahem, how long have you been standing there?"

"AARRGH!! MY SCYTHE!! WHAT HAS BEFALLEN MY ONCE SILVER-AND-NOT-RED SCYTHE?! *lick* Oh, jam."