Satan

Okay, for those of you who have been stereotyping Satan for the last goodness knows how many years, you can stop right now. I bet you've all been taught that Satan is the embodiment of sin and that he rules over Hell etc. etc. Let me tell you right here, right now, that you've all been taught WRONG!!!!

If you want to know the truth behind Satan, then continue reading. If you'd prefer to stick with your pathetic little Christian stereotype, then go ahead and f**k off!!!

Who is Satan?
Aah, I'm glad you asked. Well children, Satan is a a schizophrenic. He hears strange voices in his head. He was once chums with Bawbicus McBawbington, until the latter became obsessed with getting revenge on his adopted brother, Bob, who stole his parent's affection from him. Satan was shocked at his best pal's sudden malicious change in personality. He was scared. He ran away and hoped Bawbicus wouldn't hunt him down and rape his butt. Luckily, that never happened. Lord Analiser did that. ROFLMAO. This trauma led to Satan's psychological meltdown. He went through a phase of being an emo, but he found the skinny-jeans highly uncomfortable and the whole suicide thing a little tedious. So he resorted to being a schizophrenic. He currently lives in a caravan in Arkansas. His arms have a random and paradoxical tendency to fall off.

Trivia
Satan was friends with Bawb before he started speaking gangsta.

Satan's arms are made of felt which is toxic to this atmosphere which is why he lives underground. This made people think it was hell.

Satan invented blue socks.

Satan hates his invention's antithesist, yellow gloves.

Satan drools all over Death in episode 4 of "The Stupid Geek Moron People show".

Satan hates links that sound like one thing but lead to something antithesistual, like this: Smart Person with no allergies.

Satan invented Microsoft.